


Snake Charmer

by Dareandwriteit



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Canon Compliant, Crowley forgot he was a snake, Hypnotism, I didn't mean for this be horny or sad but that's Good Omens for you, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-26
Updated: 2019-08-26
Packaged: 2020-09-27 03:22:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20400853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dareandwriteit/pseuds/Dareandwriteit
Summary: There are no species of snake on Earth that can hypnotise people who look directly into their eyes. This is because the only snake that can is actually a demon, and he prefers to wear sunglasses.Crowley accidentally has Aziraphale under his demonic power. Aziraphale reveals things neither of them wanted to hear.





	Snake Charmer

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TheUniverseIsRarelySoLazy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheUniverseIsRarelySoLazy/gifts).

It was rare Crowley ever went without his sunglasses. This was not to hide his snake eyes from humans, though this was the most sensible reason he could give for wearing them. It had once, maybe several thousand years ago, been for that reason. Crowley had learned rather quickly in his capacity as a demon that humans were quite stubbornly against seeing reality when they could just pretend to see what they expected. In all honesty, Crowley disliked his eyes. Ruined the mystique of hiding among humans. Was obnoxiously demonic, in the same way horns and pointed tails were. If they must insist on being chaotic agents of temptation, they should at least have the benefit of not needing surmount the awkwardness of eyes that glow in the dark.

It was different with Aziraphale though. Aziraphale loved to see Crowley without his sunglasses. He had never said anything to the effect. Bastard stubbornly radiated joy at the slightest provocation. All you had to do was give him a slice of cake or compliment him and the angel would _glow_. But this was something else. Something private. Something that was wordless.

Crowley was attempting to pinpoint what it was, whether it was something in his eyes. Somewhere in the soft lines of his face. They were sitting at their usual table, their conversation drifted into obscurity under the house piano’s melody. Aziraphale was looking back at him, smiling softly. It was enough for Crowley to almost short out the waiters phone when he intruded with Aziraphale’s customary cake selection.

“Who ordered the house platter?”

Crowley looked to Aziraphale, waiting for the customary childish squeal and excitable wriggle. But today, there was nothing. Aziraphale simply stared back at him, meeting Crowley’s eyes.

“Angel?” Crowley said, after a moment’s hesitation.

Aziraphale replied with a vacant “hmmm?”

“It’s his.” Crowley said, waving his hand to rush the waiter back to kitchen faster than a human should be able to move. The plate landed with a slight clatter on the table.

Crowley asked if Aziraphale was okay. He got a response of “hmmm”.

Crowley asked if Aziraphale wanted his food. “Yes…” Azirphale said vaguely, but he made no move for the plate.

Crowley tipped his head to side, curious, not concerned at all. Nope, not at all. Aziraphale tipped his to the side, mirroring Crowley.

“Are you mocking me Angel?!” Crowley snapped.

“Not at all...” Aziraphale said distantly, with none of his usual pomp and faux offense.

Crowley straightened his head. Aziraphale straightened his head. Crowley winked. Aziraphale winked. Crowley stuck out his tongue. Aziraphale stuck out his tongue.

“What’s wrong with you?” Crowley said, bluntly.

“Don’t quite know.” Aziraphale said, rather vaguely. “Feel rather… floaty.”

“Floaty? That giant bookshop full of words and you go with floaty? Say something more specific, like-”

“Dissociated. Distant. Out of control.” Aziraphale rattles off, like a gumball machine spitting out sweets.

“Alright… Angel, can you swear to-”

“Bugger. Damn.” Aziraphale replied, all bashfulness lost. Crowley couldn’t quite suppress the smile that tugged at the corners of his mouth.

“What I was going to say was- bugger is the worst swearing you could conjure?”

“Fuck?” Azirphale offered.

“You aren’t messing with me, are you?” Crowley said, amusement quickly dampened. This seemed more concerning.

Aziraphale shook his head, mouth agape and expression unfocused. Well, that was not entirely true. His eyes were quite intently locked on…

“Shit!” Crowley snapped, much to the chagrin of their fellow diners. He hurriedly took out his sunglasses from inside his jacket, moving so fast he fumbled and dropped them squarely on Aziraphale’s cake platter.

It is believed in some cultures that snakes are capable of hypnotising those who attempt to look deep into their eyes. The eyes are the windows to the soul, and snakes are rather good at slithering through windows if they so wish.

There are no species of snake on Earth that can hypnotise people who look directly into their eyes. This is because the only snake that can is actually a demon, and he prefers to wear sunglasses.

The bloody angel. Spent so much time making Crowley feel human, he forgot that on some deep level he was actually a snake. 

Aziraphale took the glasses before Crowley could.

“Zira-” Crowley started, reaching across the table to take them. Aziraphale lifted the glasses up to his mouth, puffing a breath against the lenses.

Crowley held his breath. “Angel.”

Aziraphale took out his handkerchief, what bastard had one of those anymore, and lovingly wiped the smears of cream and jam off of them.

“I like you without your sunglasses.” Aziraphale said dreamily. “You look-”

“S-stop talking, Angel, you’re not able to control yourself.”

Aziraphale looks confused. “You look angelic.”

Crowley snatched at the glasses, making the whole table jolt noisily. “I’m a _demon_, I’m nothing like an angel.”

Aziraphale refused to rushed, lifting the glasses up to light. “But you were. You’re still as beautiful-”

“Oh yes, hypnotising you over dinner is truly celestial behaviour.” Crowley sniped, leaning forward with his palm up for the glasses. Aziraphale ignored it in favour of placing the glasses on Crowley’s face for him. 

Crowley wanted to push him off, push him away. This is wrong, in a way that Crowley knows he should not be concerned by as a demon. His demonic powers were made for this exact purpose. And isn’t this what he’s wanted? To be this close to Aziraphale. To see deep into his eyes. Aziraphale kept leaning closer, Crowley could count the freckles on the bridge of his nose, could see the long pale eyelashes, could feel the warmth of him blushing.

“Crowley, you should know that I feel-”

Crowley snapped his fingers.

Aziraphale blinked. Once, twice. He noticed where he was, the fact he was inches from Crowley’s face.

“Um.” Crowley said intelligently.

“Um.” Aziraphale said intelligently.

“Your food is here.” Crowley said, indicating the now mildly flattened cakes.

“Oh. Good. Wonderful. Delightful.” Aziraphale says, leaning back to his seat. He seems dazed, unsure where he is.

“You okay there Angel? Or did the merlot finally get to you?” Crowley said, more casually than he felt.

“I suppose it did…” Aziraphale said, moving the plate to him and realising he needed a clean fork. He looked to Crowley’s plate and then to Crowley, suddenly frowning. “Oh! I do wish you wouldn’t wear those sunglasses when we go to dinner. They rather dislike clientele wearing them in here.”

“I look better with them.” Crowley said, taking a long sip of his wine. “Promise.”


End file.
